This article is expressly anti voting at home, written by a conservative with an agenda to push and a book to sell, and is published by a rag that spawned out of the Heritage Foundation, which created Project 2025.

I’m sure the guy who wrote “The Myth of Voter Suppression: The Left’s Assault on Clean Elections.” is going to have some very balanced and fair views on making it easier for people to vote, right?

Max Stirner and Max Payne: will break your fingers if they feel like it

The first thing I’ll say is to consider putting it off until you’re older.

That being said, if you don’t know anyone who smokes, you might find it difficult to get some yourself. Your best bet would be to make friends who already have those connections. Many dealers won’t respond if you can’t name a customer that referred you. That might be the biggest hurdle to start with if you aren’t willing to start conversations. Ask classmates about the stoners around school if you can’t think of anyone.

If you manage to make those friends who connect you, though, the actual exchange with a dealer is usually pretty chill. You meet at an agreed upon spot (perhaps a park or something, maybe their house, etc.), and you hand over the money and they hand over the weed. Then you go home. You can show up with a friend if you want, but it’s best practice to let the dealer know that before you show up. A first text might go something like, “Hey, my name is ___. Would it be cool if I bought a dime ($10 worth, often 1 gram)/dub ($20)? I got your number from ___. Would you be down to meet sometime soon?” Some more advanced dealers will offer things like dab cartridges and edibles. Weed smells, and so does paraphernalia, so be sure to keep it in an air-tight container. Don’t front money for drugs, ever. Also, be sure not to let it become too much of a habit. Limit yourself to a couple times a month, or only the weekends, etc.

A marijuana high lasts about 2-3 hours, so if you know you’ll have much more time than that, you’ll be ok. You can also go out to meet up with a friend for awhile, then both go to smoke elsewhere if their house isn’t an option. Most high-schoolers find a nearby, secluded place in some forested area to smoke in, at least where I live. Walking there and back (even while baked) is usually no big deal, unless it’s super far or something. If you don’t have a place like that nearby, any other little hidden spots you can find will probably do if they aren’t too high-key. Just be sure to clean up after yourself. Pack it in, pack it out. You might be able to smoke outside your house after your parents go to bed if you can manage your coughing. If you’re worried about the smell after smoking, smoke outside, change your clothes/put on a top layer first, and brush your teeth.

As for how to smoke, you have some options. Probably the cheapest, easiest, most concealable option would be a small pipe (I’d recommend glass). You can find cheap ones online that can be delivered to your door on websites like dhgate, if you aren’t worried about your parents opening your mail for you. There’s also bongs, joints, and vapes, which each have their own pros and cons. I’m sure there’s a million youtube tutorials for each of those options. When smoking, I think the key is to inhale properly and deeply, which may be difficult starting out. You often hear that people can’t get high their first time smoking weed, but I think this is due to improper smoking technique. I know my first time I definitely wasn’t doing it right.

That was the other thing I had considered. I ultimately figured those tourists were in the minority, though, but I could be wrong. Visiting National parks will definitely lead to seeing more of the country seeing as most aren’t that close to a major airport, but at the same time, it’s a specific destination in the same way a major city is, in that many will come just for the park and then leave. Maybe that doesn’t matter, though.

Of course, and that’s not what I had in mind, either. All of those places are most certainly worth making trips to. I’m just assuming there are some countries even most Europeans don’t bother visiting. Maybe Moldova (sorry Moldovans)? Again, I don’t really know, though.

Yeah, but in the same sense that when one says they’ve “travelled” the US, chances are they’ve only actually seen a small portion of the country, just like it’s a little dubious when US tourists claim to have “travelled” Europe and only actually seen a small portion of the continent. The contiguous US is only a little bigger than Europe, most US states rival European countries in terms of size, and many European countries have administrative regions (using whatever term they prefer) that are also roughly the size of many US state counties, so I feel it’s actually a pretty apt comparison all the way down. San Bernardino County, CA, for example, is about the size of Tuscany.

I’m surprised your main gripe with places like LA or NY are that they’re too big and sprawling and not that they’re dirty and full of unseemly things like homelessness and drug use (though I feel those issues are blown out of proportion by the culture war and deserve actual help). That’s par for the course for many big cities, though.

I’d agree that most large cities have the same problem with travelling any large area in that you could live there for years and still not see everything. Any big city will have cool places to check out, but you’ll definitely get an authentic USA experience visiting places like the ones you’ve been: blue-collar workers enjoying a beer after their shift at the local dive bar; small town events and celebrations; regional gatherings like rodeos, etc.; tiny, greasy, 50-year-old eateries with the best burgers or BBQ around, etc. Simple living. It’s not all so romantic, though. There’s a fair amount of poverty in those parts of the country and substance-abuse is quite common in some parts, too. People tend to be very friendly, though, which isn’t always the case in larger cities.

Appalachia ought to be on your list for seeing rednecks as well. It has the same problems, but also many of the same kinds of draws. It also has a lot of natural beauty. Totally different kind of redneck. Another kind still, are the bayou rednecks.

Can’t blame you for wanting to stay away at this point, though.

This was my first thought when I saw your meme lol. Only other major destination might be Chicago

I’m sure that’s true for many people. When European tourists visit the US, however, how many are actually going deep into the interior of the US? Most tourists, I’d imagine, would be staying somewhat near one of the coasts and mainly sticking to the major cities. I doubt many Europeans have anywhere in Nebraska on their itineraries. Probably not a ton of European tourists in the US right now anyway, but I mean in the recent past at times of relative political normalcy.

It makes sense, though. Most people who are travelling don’t have the time or money to spend months seeing all the highlights of a place as large as Europe or the US. Even just these countries offer a ton to see, whether its the cities or the countryside. I can’t speak for how well-traveled Europeans are, but very few people in the US, even those who have lived long lives here, are able to say they’ve even visited every state, let alone seen the whole country. I bet that’s probably true of Europe for Europeans, too.

I myself don’t have much money for travelling, so I’ve only been to 11 states (and never even left the country), and I certainly did not see everything those states had to offer. Some states are often called “fly-over” states and, frankly, aren’t usually considered worthwhile places to visit anyway (even by Americans), so you can be forgiven for skipping those. I’m sure Europe has its equivalents, too.

Seems insane to me to not even say where it was found, that’s like a critical piece of the story. It would give important context as to why it took so long to find. Was it in someone’s personal collection? Was it just randomly dumped in some hidden alley or something?

War of the Worlds was written by H.G. Wells, not Orson Welles. Orson did, however, do that famous radio performance of War of the Worlds in the 30s that ostensibly (but probably not actually according to more modern analysis) caused widespread panic among its listeners.

I always get these two and George Orwell confused. On top of the somewhat similar names, the fact that Orson Welles/H.G. Wells both have that War of the Worlds connection and H.G. Wells/George Orwell both being famous authors doesn’t help, either.

I also want to add that evolution is a species-wide phenomenon over hundreds or thousands of generations, it’s not done individually.

Wow, what a thorough answer, thank you! The summation was almost poetic, in a beautiful and somewhat horrifying way. The whole system laid out like that almost seems a bit dark and dystopian in kind of an indescribable way. It sounds like a sentient, Lovecraftian rat’s-nest of wires running the whole world.

Gotta be drugs, right? I can’t think of many other things that might lead someone to steal from their own relatives. Not good at all, but at least he could blame addiction. With 4chan in mind, though, I shudder to think that they might have robbed their aunt just to get enough money to buy some stupid hobby/collector’s item. What’s his plan now, though? Still no cash in hand. He could try selling them anonymously on craigslist, but it’s risky keeping the stolen goods on you and he probably doesn’t know any fences. Fortunately for OOP, cops don’t give a shit about houses getting robbed and aren’t going to follow-up on it by tracking down and seeing in person all the possible listings. Their aunt will never hear back from those cops. OOP just better hope his aunt doesn’t see any of that footage herself and recognize him.

Indeed, Chinese cops laid siege to various universities during the Hong Kong protests, which were strongholds of opposition and organization, just like American universities have also been under siege at times for the same reasons regarding their Palestine protests. Cops never change and they’ll always have the cop mindset, though I will say that American cops seem to be especially trigger-happy. From what I see, cops in most other countries are able to neutralize threats with non-lethal force most of the time. I never hear about German cops, who I believe also carry guns, shooting someone’s dog or unloading into a guy failing to follow conflicting instructions being shouted at him. I can’t claim to know much about German cops, though. Maybe someone with more knowledge could fill me in.

The Hong Kong protests, though… I’m not saying that’s worse than American police, but I have little reason to believe they’d be much better, either. Your experience may not reflect the whole truth.

That’s called a fossil word, a word that only ever gets used in a specific phrase. When was the last time you heard the word “inclement” outside of the phrase “inclement weather”?

Japan has strawberries that can be $500+ each.

Seth hasn’t been writing for Family Guy since like 2006

According to Wikipedia:

“The experiments were recorded by the monk Salimbene di Adam in his Chronicles, who was generally extremely negative about Fredrick II (portraying his calamities as parallel to the Biblical plagues in The Twelve Calamities of Emperor Frederick II) and wrote that Frederick encouraged ‘foster-mothers and nurses to suckle and bathe and wash the children, but in no ways to prattle or speak with them; for he would have learnt whether they would speak the Hebrew language (which he took to have been the first), or Greek, or Latin, or Arabic, or perchance the tongue of their parents of whom they had been born. But he laboured in vain, for the children could not live without clappings of the hands, and gestures, and gladness of countenance, and blandishments.’”

So, as you’d expect of someone raised without any formal language, other means of communication were necessary.